Bob Hope welcomes guests Jack Benny, Bobby Darim and Ethel Merman.
Jack's debut program. The Sportsmen Quartet introduce the show, singing "There's No Business Like Show Business." (which was the closing theme song during the radio program). Mel Blanc plays a TV technician, who interrupts Jack to wave to his Aunt Sophie. The monologue and the sketch are about how Jack decided to go on television, and how he put his initial show together. Rochester sings "My Blue Heaven" while doing his housework. Mr. Kitzel drops by to wish Jack good luck. Dinah Shore sings "I'm Yours" over the phone to see if Jack approves of it for her guest spot. On the show, Ken Murray drops by to wish Jack good luck, and Dinah and Jack sing a duet: "I Oughta Know More About You." The Sportsmen Quartet do the Lucky Strike commercial. Jack closes the program playing his signature song "Love in Bloom" on the violin and thus driving the audience away.
Benny and Sinatra do a skit on New York City. Sinatra sings 'Take My Love.' Benny and Rochester do a skit, and Benny and Faye Emerson do a skit. Frank Fontaine plays the character John L.T. Savonie that he later developed into Crazy Guggenheim on The Jackie Gleason Show.
When Jack hears that Colbert and Rathbone will star in Montgomery's television show, he tries to replace Rathbone.
The guest star is singer Dorothy Shay, the Park Avenue hillbilly. Bob Crosby interrupts one of Jack's jokes in the opening monologue to sing 'I'm sending you a big bouquet of roses.' Mel Blanc plays a taxi driver. Dorothy Shay sings 'Beverly Hills.' Jack leads the Beverly Hillbillies in singing 'You are my sunshine.'
Jack’s Maxwell breaks down in Beverly Hills while Rochester is driving him to the studio. His monologue is about Christmas presents for his cast and crew. He then introduces three guest stars: Helène Françoise, a French singer; Lynette Bryant, the poker-faced little girl from the hillbilly act in his last program; and jujitsu expert Leon Salvadore, who is supposed to be able to throw anyone within 12 seconds; six guys from the Twelfth Street Gym knock him out.
Jack opens with a monologue on his movie career. He introduces Ray Noble. Don doesn't want to do the commercial Jack wrote, claiming it is too silly, but Jack makes him do it. Noble plays a tune on the piano. The sketch consists of a parody of the film Gaslight.
Gracie can't be found for her scheduled appearance on the show, so Jack has to dress up as a woman and do a comedy bit as Gracie with George. The Sportsmen Quartet does the Lucky commercial--Any time you light a Lucky--in Jack's crowded dressing room. When Gracie finally arrives, she thinks George has been playing around with another woman (Jack).
Rochester has been taking bowling lessons. Dennis gets his bowling ball stuck on his finger. Jack plays 'Flight of the Bumblebee' with his guest, Isaac Stern.
Jack is preparing to leave for a concert tour of England. The Sportsmen Quartet sing 'Bye Bye Benny' for the Lucky commercial. The doctor gives Jack his shots. His agent brings in a supporting act, the 'Landrew Sisters,' who audition by singing 'Did you ever see a dream walking?'
Jack introduces new cast member, Bob Crosby, who won't sing until his contract is signed. They discuss the situation while Don does the commercial for Lucky Strike. Bob agrees to sing when Jack tells him to come over after the show and they will sign it then. Crosby sings "You belong to me." After the show, Jack and Rochester rearrange the house to make it look shabby so Bob will feel guilty about taking more than $50 a week, but Bob has a trick of his own, and gets Jack to sign it for $500.
Western skit. Good girl Dinah is forced to sing in a saloon because she must raise $2000 to pay off the mortgage to bad guy Leonard, or marry him. After Dinah sings 'My Momma done told me,' Benny challenges Leonard to poker, in order to raise money for Dinah, but loses. Back in the saloon, Dinah tries to shoot Benny because he couldn't help her, but Benny's gun, which always hits the wrong person, kills Leonard. Dinah and Benny embrace. Benny introduces Alan Hale, Jr. and Randy Stuart to promote Biff Baker U.S.A. Dinah Shore and the Sportsmen Quartet do a singing commercial for Lucky Strike.
Bob Crosby sings 'Peter Pan.' Jack signs an autograph for a little girl from Washington named Margaret Truman. At home, Jack falls asleep and two men try to rob him, encountering many booby traps in his bedroom.
It is New Year's Eve and the Stewarts plan to spend a quiet, romantic evening in a restaurant, but Jack appears with Mabel Flapsaddle, a loud telephone operator at CBS who is bowled over by Stewart. The Stewarts' evening is spoiled.
Jack explains to an interviewer in his dressing room that he would rather have been a concert violinist than a comedian. In a flash-back, we see him practicing as a small boy, and as a 17-year-old. Don Wilson does the Lucky commercial as a ballet, in tobacco-leaf costume. Jack imagines that he is playing with a large orchestra. At the end of the show, Ann Sothern comes on to plug Private secretary.
Bob Crosby sings 'A Foggy day in London Town.' Jack plays both Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde in the sketch.
While rehearsing for his show, the producers give him a two hour break and Jack decides to visit his sponsor to renew his option. While waiting in the lobby, Fred Allen is inside talking with Mr. Lewis, President and sponsor. Allen is trying to convince Mr. Lewis not to renew Jack's option and hire him instead. Mr. Lewis says he needs some time to think about it and Allen starts to leave. Seeing Jack in the lobby, he races back in to Mr. Lewis' office and Mr. Lewis hides him in the closet. Mr. Lewis asks for Jack to come in and they discuss his option. What is normally a formality affair becomes increasingly evident to Jack that this time, it is not so. He eventually finds his option in the trash can and is shocked. Mr. Lewis convinces him that the wind blew it off his desk but that he does want just a few days to think about it. Jack, seemingly appeased, starts to leave but chooses the wrong door, thereby exposing Allen. Jack hits the roof but quickly forgives Allen and they leave tog
Jack prepares a dinner party to celebrate the end of the TV season. Bob and Gisele arrive before the other guests and sing a Lucky commercial. Jack takes Gisele down to the vault to get the money he owes her for previous appearances on his show.
After Jack's monologue he tells about his cruise to Hawaii with Rochester, where they encounter a series of characters on the ship Jack takes a nap and dreams that Marilyn Monroe is on board with him. Marilyn sings to Jack and tells him she is crazy about him. This was Marilyn's first appearance on network TV. The commercial consists of a Lucky Strike hula. First show of the 1953 season. Guest stars: Marilyn Monroe, Joe Kearns, Artie Auerbach.
One of Jack's elderly fans interrupts his monologue to request that he kiss her like he kissed Marilyn Monroe. Rochester comes out to tell Jack that an interviewer is waiting for him backstage. The Sportsmen Quartet do the Lucky commercial to the tune of 'By the light of the silvery moon.' In the sketch, Jack tells the interviewer about his childhood. In flashback, Jack plays his own father, arguing with little Jack over money, and playing in a string quartet.
Bob Crosby gets angry at Jack for cutting his song, and Don is upset because his commercial is to be cut. In the sketch, Jack plays a detective trying to get a confession out of 'Baby Face,' the killer, played by Bogart. Bogart is promoting his new picture Beat the Devil.
It is Rochester's day off, and Jack has to make his own lunch. Don arrives, and Rochester sings the commercial to him; they do a soft-shoe routine together. A messenger arrives with Johnnie Ray's contract for a guest appearance, and Jack is horrified to see that Ray wants $10,000. Jack goes to Ray's home to tell him off, and have him sing to see if he is worth the money. Ray sings 'Please don't talk about me when I'm gone,' and 'Cry.' Jack is devastated and agrees to Ray's price. At the end of the show, Danny Thomas makes a guest appearance to plug Make Room for Daddy.
While Benny is getting a haircut, he reads that Gregory Ratoff is planning a new production starring Irene Dunne and Vincent Price. Since he has always wanted to play against Irene Dunne, he goes to first Ratoff and then Dunne to try to get them to give him Price's part. He then invites himself to Dunne's house for the first rehearsal, which he disrupts by cracking walnuts and bungling lines.
Benny does a monologue on his Christmas gifts, then remembers last New Year's Eve: Mary is giving a party, but Jack is not planning to go because he has a date with Gloria. After the show, the cast gathers in Jack's dressing room. Crosby sings 'Let's start the new year right,' with the Sportsmen Quartet. Jack gets a call from Gloria cancelling their date. He refuses to go to the party, and instead wanders the streets alone, finally stopping for coffee at Nick's Cafe, where the waitress turns out to be Gloria. He goes home, where he and Rochester ring in the new year together.
Jack tries to call Liberace. Two operators, Gertrude and Mabel, talk about Jack. Jack finally decides to go to Liberace's home. The house is filled with candelabra. Liberace asks Jack to appear with him in concert. After Liberace performs solo, the two play 'September song' together, Jack on his violin.
Mary calls and says she is coming over because she has something delicate to discuss; Jack thinks she is going to agree to marry him at last, but she just wants him to stop being so cheap. He daydreams about what their 21st anniversary would be like if she would marry him: in the dream, he is a would-be radio actor who keeps house while his wife works; his daughter Joan plays herself.
Jack wants Helen Hayes to teach him to be a dramatic actor in her acting school. Jack gets his big break when Hayes receives a phone call and learns that one of her students is ill and cannot play in the class performance that night. Jack fills in. It turns out that the class is for children. Don does a singing commercial from behind the Lucky Strike window, just like Dorothy Collins.
Jack tells Don about the time his vaudeville act with George Burns and Bing Crosby played Scranton, Pennsylvania; the name of their act was Goldie, Fields and Glide. Benny tries to convince Crosby to appear on his program with Burns to do their old act, but Crosby wants more money than Benny is willing to pay. Cameo by Bob Hope. Crosby sings 'Gypsy In My Soul.'
Jack, George Burns, and Gracie Allen do the same sketch they did on the program of March 9, 1952. The Sportsmen Quartet do the Lucky commercial to the tune of the Black Ball Ferry Line.
Mel Blanc and Joe Besser play photographers who want to take Jack's picture. The Sportsmen Quartet does the Lucky Strike commercial to the tune of 'Mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the noonday sun.' The sketch is an English drawing room farce in which Jack plays Cecil Frothingham, England's foremost matinee idol, in love with Margaret Hayes, who is married to David Niven.
Bob steals Jack's pants in order to precede him onstage. Jack wears Don's pants, and Bob gives Jack's pants to Don. The sketch is entitled 'On the road to Nairobi.' The Sportsmen Quartet, in African costume, sings the Lucky commercial to the tune of 'Digga digga doo.' Jack and Bob enter and are eventually placed in a pot by natives, who have trouble lighting the fire. Martin and Lewis, in the audience, offer to supply a match.
Jack's monologue includes a discussion of the premiere of A Star is Born. Then he falls asleep onstage. Don comes out and explains that Jack has been nervous all day about this first show of the new season. The sketch depicts Jack's day.
Jack delivers a monologue on critics. He is anxious to get home because at 8 p.m. some friends are coming over for their weekly jam session. At home, the guests arrive: Tony Martin with his clarinet, Fred MacMurray with his saxophone, Dick Powell with his trumpet, Dan Dailey with his drums, and Kirk Douglas with his banjo. Guests must purchase food, drink or smokes from vending machines in Jack's closet. They play 'Basin Street.' Jack holds a contest for the most popular guest.
Jack tells an interviewer how he met Mary Livingstone years before when she worked at The May Co. Rochester sings and dances with The Sportsmen Quartet.
The sketch is a take-off on the Caine Mutiny. Benny plays Alvin Dark, captain of the N.Y. Giants during the fourth game of the World Series. He rebels against Durocher's harsh tactics, and is court-martialled. His judges are managers Dressen and Haney, pitcher Lemon, and umpire Reardon. Durocher plays with two baseballs in imitation of Captain Queeg.
Jack is planning his life story for the next week's telecast, and the show opens with Rochester typing up the script. Mel Blanc plays the postman delivering a telegram. The Sportsmen Quartet sing 'You must have been a beautiful baby.' Benny auditions actors for the show; he casts a beautiful girl as his first love, and his real first love as his mother. Instead of casting the little boy trying out for the part of himself as a boy, he casts the tough, pushy little boy who is acting as his agent.
Jack looks for Christmas gifts in a department store, and encounters Nelson as the floor manager, Blanc and Pepper as salespeople, Rubin as a bandit. The Sportsmen Quartet sing the Lucky commercial in the elevator.
Jack comes home after a hard day at work and tries to wind down. Once in bed, he encounters a dripping faucet. Once asleep, 2 burglars try to rob Jack, but encounter numerous obstacles along the way.
Jack reads a public service announcement on behalf of the IRS, and jokes about the Band's deductions. Gisele MacKenzie comes out, and she and Jack talk about funny names: Snooky Lanson, Gisele, and Jack's middle name, Tecumseh. Gisele gives him a kiss from Dorothy Collins. Then Gisele sings a comic medley about Paris. Don, his wife Lois, and his son Harlow come out to beg for one more chance for Harlow as an announcer; Harlow attempts the Lucky Strike ad, but flubs it to the point that even his mother yells at him, and breaks Jack's violin over his head. Jack and Gisele play 'Getting to know you' as a violin duet.
Jack, awakened by a phone call at 4 a.m., cannot get back to sleep. After he decides to go for an early morning walk, he comes home exhausted, but Mary comes over and reminds him that they were to go shopping for a new suit for Jack.
George Raft Guest stars in "The Lunch Counter Morders" a spoof of the movie "The Killers". Later remade on 12-04-1960
Jack takes The Beverly Hills Beavers to the fair. The boys want balloons, so Jack buys some, but gets carried away, literally. After being shot down, Jack buys the boys hot dogs from Mr. Kitzel, and then tries to knock down milk bottles to win the boys prizes. But Jack does it the hard way. While playing ring the bell, Jack knocks the bell right off the pole. After coming face to face with Gorgo the gorilla, Jack finds out its only Mr. Kitzel in disguise. Later, they watch the Sportsmen sing, and Jack steps into a cage with a lion, thinking the lion is Mr. Kitzel, he's wrong. On the way out, they pass a dancing hula girl, the boys want to go in, but Jack says no. Until he learns the dancing girl is Mr. Kitzel.
With Gary Crosby as a guest, doing a duet with Mary Livingstone on his show, Jack is sure he'll have a good one, but always relies on Rochester's opinion rather than what the TV critics say, just as Mary depends on her mother's viewpoint. Unfortunately, both fell asleep and missed it.
Jack's in a terrible dilemma. He has to decide whether to go to a fancy-dress ball or try to appear on the Groucho Marx quiz show. He's heard that the jackpot is worth 3000 dollars. And who'll be there to give it out? None other than 'that's me ”Groucho Marx,' in person.
To meet his sponsor in New York, Jack and Rochester pack their bags and a parrot and head to the train station. Their taxi driver is a blubbering wreck who hates to see people leaving.At the station they encounter friends like Don and Mr. Kitzel, and pests like Frank Nelson.
While in New York, Jack wants to impress Jackie Gleason, so he and Rochester move into the penthouse suite of the luxurious St. Regis Hotel, and there's no length Jack won't go to, in order to avoid having to pay the $36 a night rental.
Presented by Lucky Strike. Jasck's monologue is about new discoveries in makeup, the time difference. Jack introduces Dennis Day, who sings "Yellow Rose of Texas."
Jack Shows what he Does to relax after a show. He goes to get a massage and the masseur used Chicken Fat and then later to a night club with Gertrude Gearshift.
Jack is featured in Look! Magazine. Mel Blanc heckles Jack from the audience. Guest stars Peggy King and Art Linkletter.
When Jack's latest violin lesson causes Professor LeBlanc to attempt suicide, Jack becomes depressed. Rochester comes up with a scheme to boost Jack's confidence: he tricks Jack into thinking that music being played by Isaac Stern (who's hiding in the closet) is actually a recording of Jack's violin playing. Delighted, Jack hurries to a recording studio to cut a record, but his music destroys the equipment. After discovering the truth, Jack thanks Rochester for his efforts. For an encore, Stern and pianist Alexander Zakin perform "Polonaise Nº 1 in D Major"
Jack Gives Johnny Carson Advice" about maintaining a long show business career through versatility, but Johnny turns the tables on him by displaying his many talents including singing, dancing and drumming.
Jack hears there's uranium for the finding in Death Valley, so he's off to buy gear for an expedition. At the camping store he duels his nemesis, the sarcastic sales clerk Frank Nelson. In the desert Jack's party confronts other prospectors, and some Mexican stereotypes a la Treasure of Sierra Madre.
The Sportsmen sing a tune composed by a couple of Benny's staffers, "That's How Santa Claus Will Look This Year." Don has spent $1000 on the supposedly great Enrico Scortichinni to perform with them. Jack is upset when Enrico's only contribution is an occasional "Ho, ho, ho." Jack goes to Edgar Bergen's home to discuss his appearance on the show. While waiting for Edgar to arrive, wife Frances sings a number. Jack's goes into shock when he learns the incredible truth about Bergen's dummies: they're alive! Charlie McCarthy walks into the room, followed soon by Mortimer Snerd, and Jack can only stare slack-jawed. Edgar Bergen doesn't arrive until afterward and has Jack sit on his knee to discuss the show
Essentially a filmed radio show, a few chairs and a microphone on a stage, Jack and company re-create what was a tradition on his radio show, a skit where "Old Year" packs up and moves out and "New Year" moves in.
Jack is sick with a bad cold and Rochester is his nurse and Mary is fixing him something to eat. Jack is waiting for his lawyer to show up as Jack wants him to break Don Wilson's contract as Jack is blaming him for his cold. In a flashback, we learn that after a show rehearsal, Don Wilson invites them to his house to see some anniversary gifts and Jack repeatedly warns Don to check with his wife, Lois, Don always declines. After arriving at Don's house and after Jack is told by Mary to pay the $1.85 taxi bill and Jack gives the driver a 15 cent tip., Don is now worried that he should have checked with his wife first. Don has them wait at the corner of the house while he checks with Lois. Lois informs Don that she just opened a can of tuna as she didn't have time to go shopping. Don decides to have the gang show up unexpectedly. Don invites Mary and Bob in first. Dennis Day and Jack have to wait. Jack tells Dennis that it looks like rain. a couple of minutes later, Don comes out and invites Dennis to come and tells Jack to wait. Then it starts to rain and Jack is soaked and decides to go in the house. As he stands up, Jack is accosted by a burglar who tells Jack: "Your money or your life". Jack pauses and the burglar says it again and Jack responds: "I'm thinking it over". Don then yells for Jack to come in now. Back to the present and now we know why Jack caught his cold. Jack's attorney, Mr. Kearns, hand him Don's contract and after reading it, says he changed his mind about getting rid of Don. After seeing what he pays Don, Jack says " I deserve it" (the cold). One last bit has Jack trying to get free medical information by calling up Mary's doctor and pretending to be a game show, "Take It or Lose It", calling and asks the doctor how to treat bronchitis.
Jack tells the story of how he first met Rochester, while riding on a train.
William Holden shows Jack How to play a love scene
Jack relies on Rochester, his toughest critic, to give him an honest evaluation of the show, but when Rochester accidentally sleeps through the program, he tries to cover up with evasive answers to Jack's questions. At first Jack is angry when he discovers the truth, but later he sees Rochester packing and is afraid that he's leaving (unaware that Rochester is simply getting ready for a camping trip). Jack offers him extra days off — even Labor Day — and makes him a steak dinner, and Rochester milks the situation for all it's worth.
Jack intends to vacation in Palm Springs and does a bit with his parrot, Polly, and then gets gas for his old car before he & Rochester get to Palm Springs. At the hotel, Jack tips the bell boy a dime. Jack is so anxious to jump in the pool that he runs to the diving board and jumps. Unfortunately, the pool is empty and being cleaned by two workmen. Jack ends up landing in a bucket. Jack's wife Mary arrives and is told what happened. The show ends with the doctor pulling back the bed covers, revealing the bucket still attached to jacks rear.
Jack opens a business office in Beverly Hills, and cuts expenses by sharing the suite with an interior decorator and hiring a surly drugstore waitress as a receptionist. Dore Schary, the head of MGM, comes to talk to Jack about a movie role, but Jack's not thrilled with the part or the money. Dore makes an offer to the decorator instead.
Jack reads a public service announcement on behalf of the IRS, and jokes about the Band's deductions. Gisele MacKenzie comes out, and she and Jack talk about funny names: Snooky Lanson, Gisele, and Jack's middle name, Tecumseh. Gisele gives him a kiss from Dorothy Collins. Then Gisele sings a comic medley about Paris. Don, his wife Lois, and his son Harlow come out to beg for one more chance for Harlow as an announcer; Harlow attempts the Lucky Strike ad, but flubs it to the point that even his mother yells at him, and breaks Jack's violin over his head. Jack and Gisele play "Getting to know you" as a violin duet.
Jack is frustrated at the passport office.
Jack has pre-concert jitters because he is to play Carnegie Hall in an hour. He gets a visit from old friend Spike Jones. Afterwards, Jack falls asleep and dreams that Mendelssohn tells him that he plays the violin beautifully. Jack wakes, then sleeps again; this time, he dreams the Devil (George Burns) tells him he can make Jack the greatest violinist of all time. Jack begins to play with the orchestra, but after a few members leave, Jones takes over the conductor's podium, and crazy music and comedy ensue. In the end, Jones shoots Benny and he is carried away on a stretcher, still playing.
Jack is running for president of a club for wealthy boys, the Beverly Hills Beavers Club. George Gobel, whose nephew is in the club, decides to run against Jack; each get one vote, and the winner is Red Skelton, uncle of another of the boys.
Rochester is cleaning house and discovers Jack's diary from 1945; he reads an entry in which Jack reports that he was invited to dinner at Ronald Colman's house. Rochester remembers in flash-back what really happened. Jack tells Mary, Don and Don's wife Lois that he has found an invitation addressed to Jack on his doorstep inviting him to dinner at the Colmans'. The Colmans have lost an invitation to their close friend Jack Wellington. To the Colmans' surprise, both Jacks arrive.
Rochester calls Jack in the middle of his monologue to tell him his Maxwell has been stolen. While he goes to the Beverly Hills Police Station, the Sportsmen cover for him, singing 'Puttin' on my top hat' while they get dressed on stage. Jack is amazed at the sumptuousness of the police station. Eventually the car is found; it has been returned to Jack's house by the thieves.
Filmed on location in London. Jack and Mary are touring London. Jack takes a lesson in British currency. Jack and Mary visit the Tower of London on a tour; Jack is so entranced with the Crown Jewels that he loses track of time and is locked in at the close of the day. He falls asleep and dreams he is a lover of Anne Boleyn about to be executed by Henry VIII.
Dennis wants to do his Elvis Presley imitation, but Jack won't let him. Don does the commercial with his son Harlow. The sketch is Jack's version of The Mikado, which is ruined by Dennis doing his Elvis imitation in his Japanese costume.
During Jack's monologue about his Christmas gifts, Don comes out to announce a purse has been found. It turns out to belong to Jayne Mansfield, who was sitting in the audience when the usher grabbed her purse she considers this to be a pretty sneaky way to get a guest star. Jack mentions The Girl Can't Help It, her latest picture. The Sportsmen Quartet and Rochester perform New Year's in Trinidad for the Lucky Strike ad. In the sketch, Jack hosts a talent contest. Mel Blanc plays an animal impersonator. The Landrew Sisters trio sings Did you ever see a dream walking. Leon Salvadore, a judo champ, is beaten by the six big men he asserts he will beat.
Filmed on location in Rome. Jack and Mary are touring Rome. At the airport, Jack is upset when adoring fans rush not to him but to opera singer Vittorio Rizetti. Sean Connery makes a ten second appearance as a porter. At his hotel, Jack can't sleep because Rizetti is singing in the next room. The next evening, after a day sightseeing, Jack discovers that the singer next door is a wine seller, and he signs him to tour the U.S., not realizing that the singing was on a record being played by the wine seller.
Dennis sings 'On the street where you live.' Don introduces Harry Von Zell in the audience, and Von Zell comes up and does the commercial so well that Jack considers firing Don and hiring him instead. Don is upset and quits. In the sketch, Jack plays the Fiddler, modelled after the Whistler (mystery radio program).
Jack's birthday is coming up, and the Friar's Club is giving him a toast; Jessel is the toastmaster. Jack introduces Governor Knight. The Sportsmen Quartet sing a birthday song, and do the commercial. In the sketch, Jessel visits Jack at home and reads him the text of his speech.
Jack does a monologue on his Emmy Award nomination. In the sketch, Hope and Benny play two vaudevillians trying to get work as a song and dance act. The Four Sports do the Lucky commercial as a barbershop quartet. After the sketch, Hope and Benny sing 'Thanks for being on my show' to the tune of 'Thanks for the memories.'
Filmed on location in Venice. While updating his photo album with Rochester, Jack recalls his visit to Venice with Mary. He plays a Stradivarius in a violin shop, feeds pigeons, and falls into the canal trying to get into a gondola.
Filmed on location in Paris. Jack and Mary are touring Paris. Jack takes French lessons from his hotel butler. Jack and Mary meet Maurice Chevalier, who sings 'Happy.'
Mary invites Jack to come to the annual reunion of her old May Co. co-workers. Rochester explains to a friend on the phone what happened when Jack went the year before. In flashback, Jack arrives at Mary's place to find Rocheser fixing a lot of food. When Mary arrives, she persuades Jack to come and meet the girls. After he leaves, the girls ask Mary if Jack ever proposed. In flashback, Jack takes Mary to buy a ring, but backs down after learning how much it costs.
Guest is Dorothy Kirsten, the opera singer. Marge and Gower Champion interrupt Jack's monologue to point out to a maintenance man a slippery spot on the stage. Jack is visited by the IRS in the sketch.
Show opens with the audience in line to see the show, telling each other how their tickets were forced on them. In his opening monologue, Jack analyzes his own humor. Dennis sings 'Around the world in 80 days.' Don does the Lucky Strike commercial as a calypso number; Jack won't let him finish it. He introduces Mel Blanc as Otto Ketzler, a novelty music act from Vienna; Ketzler plays bottles filled with alcohol--as he tunes them, he becomes more and more inebriated. Don's wife makes Jack call the sponsor to explain that the curtailed commercial was Jack's fault, not Don's.
Jack goes to the airport and encounters Leonard as the racetrack tout, Blanc in the Mexican routine, Nelson as the obnoxious ticket taker.
During the monologue, the President and Secretary of the Jack Benny Fan Club, Pasadena Chapter, come onstage. Don and Harlow Wilson do a soft shoe to 'Me and my shadow' for the Lucky commercial. Hal March, host of The $64,000 Question quiz show, is the guest; Jack asks him questions, and he tries to answer them for prizes.
Jack and his producer decide to do a musical for the show, and Jack wants to invite Ginger Rogers and Fred Astaire to appear as guests. When he visits Ginger to invite her to appear, she is getting ready to give a party, and tries to conceal the fact from him. She agrees to do the show, but Fred Astaire is unable to make it, so Jack dances with her instead.
Jack's monologue is interrupted by Lassie walking across the stage. Soon Jon Provost follows, and Lassie has to rescue him from Jack's invitation to join the Beverly Hills Beavers, once he learns Provost makes $500 a week. Benny introduces John Forsythe in the audience. Don does the Lucky Strike commercial as a man-on-the-street interview. Mel Blanc plays a passerby who is insulted when it turns out he is not being featured on This is your life. Mary Costa sings 'One fine day' from Madame Butterfly. Jack has forgotten that he asked her to dinner, and has made another date. John Forsythe asks her out instead. They go to a gypsy restaurant where they discover Jack masquerading as a gypsy violinist.
Twentieth Century Fox is planning to film Jack's life story, and he has become unbearably conceited. Don looks for a Lucky Strike at Jack's house, and a series of treasure hunt notes end with his being locked out of the house. At the Fox studios, Jack encounters the director of The Horn Blows at Midnight working as a parking lot attendant. Buddy Adler informs Jack that he is not going to star in the picture, Van Johnson is; Jack is going to play his own father.
Jack goes Christmas shopping in a large deptartment store and has trouble making up his mind. Dennis Day sings "Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer". Jack encounters Nelson as the floor manager, Blanc and Pepper as salespeople, Rubin as a bandit. The Sportsmen Quartet sing the Lucky commercial in the elevator.
Jack takes Zelda to the Rose Bowl game, but can't resist scalping his ticket at the last minute, leaving her to sit next to the stranger who bought it. The Sportsmen Quartet sing the Lucky commercial on a Rose Parade float.
Rochester does an imitation of Louis Armstrong singing I can't give you anything but love, Baby. In the sketch, Jack has to persuade a young member of the Beverly Hills Beavers that getting a tooth pulled doesn't hurt. At the dentist's office, Jack runs into his old friend, Mr. Kitzel. Jack and the dentist pretend to pull one of Jack's teeth to prove to the kid that it doesn't hurt. Unfortunately, inspection of Jack's teeth reveals he really does need to have a tooth pulled.
Dennis sings 'The 12th of never.' In the sketch, Jack plays Ralph Kramden in a take-off of The Honeymooners, with Meadows as Alice and Dennis as Ed Norton.
Dennis sings 'If I loved you.' Jack takes Mary to the races. Dennis tags along, much to Jack's dismay. Dennis tells Jack his system for betting. Don tells racetrack tout Leonard to buy Luckies. Leonard tells Jack what table to eat at. Jack meets his sponsor and convinces him to bet on the horse that Jack likes. Jack, though, is convinced by the sponsor to bet on his horse.
Jack introduces George Seaton, President of the Motion Picture Academy. Jack is upset because he has not been asked to be an emcee at the Academy Awards. He visits producer Jerry Wald to ask why he was not chosen as an emcee; Wald promises that if one of the five emcees can't make it, Jack will be the first to be called to substitute. Jack visits Jimmy Stewart, one of the five emcees, on the set of his latest picture, and ruins take after take, then plays Stewart's scene as he thinks it should be done.
Jack is going to New York to talk with his sponsor; he will stay at his usual fleabag, the Acme Plaza. A plumber (Mel Blanc) is working on Jack's pipes. A girl keeps phoning Chuck, making arrangements for her elopement; Jack never tells her it's the wrong number. Don unpacks all the suitcases, making sure they packed the Luckies. At Union Station, Mel Blanc announces trains to Anaheim, Azusa and Cucamonga, Rubin plays an information clerk, and Frank Nelson as the ticket agent has placed his own daughter in Jack's compartment. Mr. Kitsel turns up and talks with Jack. The eloping girl turns out to be Frank Nelson's daughter, and her boyfriend turns out to be the plumber.
The Easter Sunday show. In the monologue, Jack tells the audience that Rochester bought him a live bunny rabbit, and he is planning to eat it. He describes the Hollywood Easter Parade. He introduces his guest, Ronnie Burns, son of George Burns; it turns out Jack and George each claim to have given the other their first break in show business. Ronnie Burns sings She's kinda cute. Don, angry because his son Harlow was not given the featured spot, reveals that Jack pays George to be his friend, does the Lucky commercial in an angry voice, and walks off the show. A phone call from Rochester reveals Jack's new suit has arrived on the back of the store owner; at the price Jack paid, the owner could not afford a box. Jack arrives at Don's house to demand an apology for Don's walk-out; he agrees to help Harlow if Harlow will show him what he can do. Harlow and Don sing 'Sonny Boy' together.
Instead of going out to play golf as he had planned, Jack has to go to the office because there is no script for his next show yet. He harangues his writers, and then finds an old script for them to rework. Then he tells his manager he won't work with the writers or come in for the first few rehearsals because he has been working too hard; he is going to play golf instead. His manager reminisces about the days before Jack became a difficult star, and tells Jack's secretary how he discovered Jack in Arkansas playing the fiddle as Zeke Benny and his Ozark Hillbillies. In a flash-back, they play 'You are my sunshine,' 'Fascinatin' rhythm,' and 'Puttin' on the Ritz.'
Jack and Gary Cooper do a routine, and Cooper forgets his lines; he sings 'Bird dog' with the Sportsmen Quartet. In the sketch, Jack tries for the part of Cooper's twin brother in Cooper's next film; he comes to the auditions in elevator shoes and western costume, but chickens out when he realizes the part requires that he be beaten up in a barroom brawl. At the end of the show, he introduces Cooper's wife and daughter in the audience.
During Jack's monologue, the Announcers' Guild sends over a man to fill in for Don Wilson and do the commercial. He doesn't smoke, but Jack gives him a Lucky, and he loves it. Phil Harris leads the band in 'That's what I like about the South.' Jack hates the song and tries to make sense of the lyrics.
In the prologue, Marvin Miller appears at Dennis Day's door, and hands him a check for a million dollars. After the commercial, and Jack's monologue, Jack introduces Dennis, but he doesn't show. Instead, Jan and Arnie appear and sing 'The beat that can't be beat.' Jack then tries to phone Dennis, but has a hard time with the operator. He goes to Dennis' home and finds Dennis in a polo outfit, his mother dressed up, and Rochester working as his new butler. Miller returns, having given the check to the wrong person.
Mel Blanc plays a painter hired by Jack who likes to paint to music. Jack gets a new classical record in the mail; when he learns Blanc gets .50 an hour, he plays the fast side. Jack reads in the paper that the Committee for the Improvement of Beverly Hills is meeting with the mayor. Their current project is to get rid of Jack's Maxwell. They decide to hold a raffle and sell Jack the only ticket. Jack is finally persuaded to buy it, but then sells it to Blanc, who wins. Bob Hope and David Niven appear in a cameo at the end of the show.
Jack is driving to New Orleans for a benefit concert, and has advertised for riders in his car. Two crooks who want him to pick them up in front of a bank answer the ad. The Sportsmen Quartet sing 'Way down yonder in New Orleans.' Frank Nelson plays a mechanic bringing Jack's car back from the shop. George Burns wants to go with Jack and sing in the benefit concert. Mel Blanc and his wife want a ride, but quarrel over who will sit in the front seat. More and more people arrive wanting rides to New Orleans.
Jack is a nervous wreck. Oscar Levant, who is to guest on Jack's next program, convinces him to go to the doctor. While waiting for the doctor, Levant gets Jack to reveal the cause of his agitation: Frank Nelson.
In his monologue, Jack considers what he should give various members of his cast for Christmas. He introduces Gisele, and they talk about her recent trip to Europe. She sings a song in Italian. While Jack is backstage, Don introduces his son Harlow to Gisele, and she lets him do the commercial, which he keep interrupting in order to make advances to her. In the sketch, Jack puts a quarter in the coke machine, and gets a coke and two quarters back; the second time, the machine takes his money and gives him an empty coke bottle. Dennis appears to do a promo for his new Christmas album. Jack and Gisele do their customary violin duet. For a second piece, Gisele is to play a piano, out of which Red Skelton appears.
Jack takes a Christmas gift to be exchanged.
The show opens on Jack sweeping the set; he explains that he has a package deal, and anything he saves he can keep. He has Mary running the spotlight and Bob Crosby building sets. He does a monologue on his movie career. An old friend from Waukegan has asked Jack to help his daughter break into show business; she is an acrobatic dancer and cartwheels across the stage. Bob Crosby sings 'I don't care if the sun don't shine.' The sketch is a parody on Gaslight with Barbara Stanwyck.
Ernie shows Jack his moustache collection, and Jack tries some of them on. Don, dressed as a Beatnik, does the commercial with the Beatniks, to the tune of 'Beat generation.' In the sketch, Jack and Ernie are in a posh prison on Nob Hill in San Francisco; it is 1970, and Ernie is due to be released, but he doesn't want to leave the cushy life.
Jack goes to a night club and watches Danny Thomas' act.
Jack is delayed at the airport, and Dennis Day hosts the show in his place. Jack has used a cheap airline with no amenities to get from Florida to Los Angeles, and his baggage has been lost. Dennis sings Let there be love. Dennis and Don sing 'Nola' together for the Lucky Strike commercial. Jack refuses to pay the eighty-five cents owed by the last person to use a phone booth, and winds up on a wanted poster.
Don does a magic act with Jack for the Lucky Strike commercial. Jack visits the Bergens' home. Frances sings 'Them there eyes.' First Charlie McCarthy and then Mortimer Snerd come into the room. Jack is amazed he had always thought they were dummies. Edgar Bergen does not arrive until the end of the program.
Jack's monologue is about being in New York again. Genevieve sings a song in French about Paris in the spring. The sketch is a courtroom drama in which Jack plays the prosecutor and Ed Sullivan plays Gentleman Jim Sullivan, the defense attorney, defending Genevieve on a charge of murder; the part requires Ed Sullivan to do lots of emoting. Don is the commentator. For the Lucky commercial, Benny introduces into evidence Luckies found in Genevieve's purse, and Luckies found at the scene of the crime; Sullivan demonstrates that everyone in the audience smokes Luckies.
In the opening segment, Benny misses the opening of his show because he has fallen asleep in his dressing room. In his monologue, he mentions that he fell asleep because his show is now on later in the evening. Don and the Sportsmen Quartet keep doing commercials for their old sponsor, Lucky, rather than their new one, Lux. Dennis sings 'While we're young.' In the sketch, Jack imagines how his cast will all look 30 years from now.
In the opening sketch, the director says the show is too long, but Benny refuses to do the show unless they put back the line about his blue eyes. Instead, he insists that the Sportsmen Quartet do the Minute waltz commercial for Lux Soap in 40 seconds. In the main sketch, Benny does a benefit concert in Kansas City, and Truman invites him on a tour of the Harry S. Truman Library in Independence, Missouri.
Webb and Benny do a Charlie Chan skit to prove how much it is like a Dragnet show; the title of the skit is 'Dragon Net.' Benny plays Charlie Chan, and Webb plays #1 Son.
In his monologue, Jack informs the audience that Jimmy and Gloria Stewart begged him to come to their anniversary party. However, Jimmy is seen explaining to his wife that he couldn't stop Jack from inviting himself. Benny and his irritating girlfriend Mildred crash the intimate dinner party at a swanky Beverly Hills restaurant and drive the Stewarts to drastic measures.
In his monologue, Benny says he is going to follow the new CBS policy and tell the truth from now on (probably with reference to the recent quiz show scandals). Don introduces Joyce Davidson, who tries to do the Lux Soap commercial while Don and Jack interrupt her constantly. Dennis sings 'Climb every mountain.' Jack introduces Jack Paar and they spar with each other. Then Paar asks Jack to replace him while he goes to Honolulu. Jack is reluctant, so Paar tells him to try it out with his own audience, and they do a version of the Jack Paar show, with Dennis doing an imitation of Charlie Weaver.
Dennis sings 'Sinner man.' In the sketch, the Jack Benny Fan Club, Pasadena Chapter, has asked Jack to play the violin at their meeting. He plays 'Love in bloom,' and 'Swanee River,' and is joined by a small band made up of some of the members of the club, who jazz up the performance.
George visits Jack and Rochester at home. Don has given both Jack and George duck hunting gear for Christmas; they phone Don to tell him they hate his gifts. In a flash-back Don remembers the time he took Jack and George duck hunting.
Jack relates how he found Shandu the Magician in Ben Blue's restaurant and got him to appear on his show.
Jack hosts an amateur show featuring a tuba-playing boy who won't play; a beautiful girl who does a strip routine; Howard McNear as Fletcher Quill the mindreader, who does the Lux ad; and Maurice Gosfield as Pvt. Duane Doberman, now out of the Army, and who does impersonations of Hitchcock, Charles Boyer, and Bette Davis.
Jack introduces Molly Bee and they discuss 'the new generation' and rock and roll. She sings 'Have you heard?' Don does the commercial as a Shakespearian soliloquy accompanied by Jack on his violin. In the sketch, Jack has Rochester doing a television survey to determine Jack's popularity; George Gobel plays a hillbilly in Kentucky who is the only person in the U.S. who watches Jack Benny, because that is all he can get on his TV.
Jack can't get to sleep, so he practices his violin at 2 a.m., and is arrested for disturbing the peace.
Jack insists on CBS letting him direct a Playhouse 90 episode. Natalie Wood and Robert Wagner play the stars of the production directed by Jack.
Jack has entered a slogan contest for Joshua Juice Vitamins; his slogan wins, but when the prize is given to someone else, he decides to sue.
Jack and his girlfriend Mildred walk in the Beverly Hills Easter Parade, where they meet Dennis, with a duck on a string, Benny's violin teacher, Jack's two old lady fans, and a photographer who takes their picture. Don Wilson dresses as an old lady in an Easter bonnet and talks with the TV interviewer covering the parade in order to do his Lux Liquid commercial.
Jack has just returned from Hong Kong, and Don carries him onstage in a rickshaw. Dennis Day, dressed as a Japanese announcer, does the Lux Soap commercial with a Japanese accent. In the skit, Jack's sponsors decide that Dennis Day is getting all the laughs, and the show will do perfectly well if it features Dennis Day and a talking dummy resembling Jack.
Jack is preparing to begin a new season in which he will be putting on a show every week. His new publicity agent has sent out trucks that run over people, leaving a tire imprint on their backs saying 'Watch Jack Benny every week.' At the golf club, all his friends are dubious about whether he has the energy to put on a show every week. Suddenly Jack feels tired, and he goes home to take a nap; he dreams he is on Mike Wallace's interview show being grilled about his decision to go on every week. Don Wilson does the Lipton commercial like a political campaign; the Nixon/Kennedy election campaigns are mentioned several times during the show.
Jack visits Dick Clark for advice on how to get teen-agers to watch his show. Dick suggests that he book the Sabres, who sing 'Flip, flop and fly' for them, but Jack refuses to pay their 1,000 fee; on the show, Jack, Dennis and Don, dressed as the Sabres, do the number.
Jack meets Milton Berle in a restaurant and Berle hams up his entrance. He convinces Jack to alter his comedy style. They do a show together and Jack wears a clown suit, gets a pie in the face, and tells dumb jokes.
Jack gets a haircut between the dress rehearsal and the show; none of the barbers want to do it because his tips are so small. Don and Oscar the seal do the State Farm commercial. Gisele sings 'Smile'. Jack asks her for a date, but she is busy giving a party to which she has not invited Jack. They do their violin duet, during which Jack's ten dollar suit from Hong Kong comes to pieces.
Jack is in New York, and in his monologue he tells the audience about the press party he gave at the Automat. He introduces Betty Furness and John Wayne in the audience. J.R.C. Scavone [?] (Frank Fontaine) wants to know why Jack didn't introduce him. Don has Jack introduce Howard K. Brawley, the man who gave the State Farm Insurance people the idea for their horn theme. Jaye P. Morgan sings 'Won't you come home, Bill Bailey?' Jack forgot that he made a dinner date with Morgan, and has made another date. John Wayne asks her out instead. They go to a gypsy restaurant where they discover Jack masquerading as a gypsy violinist. (The same sketch was originally done on the program aired November 17, 1957.)
Jack states that due to time shortage, he has to cut his monologue. Diana Trask sings. Jack and Don visit the Copacabana to see Bishop's night club routine. Show done in New York.
Jack's monologue concerns the previous night's bachelor party. Dennis does not want to sing because Dan Duryea got the star dressing room. His mother has thrown Duryea out of the room. The sketch is entitled 'Death across the lunch counter, or He died sunnyside up.' Jack plays Charleston T. Gundlefinger, a counterman in a diner. Don plays the police chief. It is midnight, and Jack is nervous because a man was murdered across the street the week before. Three toughs (Duryea, Day and Nelson) come in and intimidate Jack. The police chief is no help. Benny shoots Duryea and Day, but Nelson turns out to be the interior decorator.
Jack takes his girlfriend Mildred to a violin concert, even though she would prefer to go to the fights. Jack spots the Stewarts in the audience and tries to get their attention by tossing peanuts at them, eventually driving them out. When Mildred turns on her transistor radio to listen to the fight, the entire audience leaves.
Jack goes Christmas shopping with Rochester and drives the staff of the department store crazy.
Jack consents to an episode of the show to be opportunity for new acts to showcase their talents but then he starts to regret deciding to do it when things don't go as he thinks they should.
Jack has written his life story for television, and has his agent hire a child actor who is just as cheap as he is to play himself. Remake of the sketch originally done on November 20, 1954.
Jack's monologue is interrupted by a phone call from U.S. Treasury agents, who want to see Jack at home in an hour. Jack is so nervous he lets Don take the rest of the show and goes home. It turns out the agents are from Fort Knox and want to study the security systems in Jack's vault.
Jack honors Don Wilson on the occasion of his 27th year working with Jack. The sketch relates how Don and Jack met: Jack's radio sponsor, the Universal Corset Co., holds auditions for an announcer for Jack's program, and Don is the only one who laughs at Jack's bad jokes. John Daly presents Don with a plaque; Jack disagrees with Daly's statement that Don came to his show when it was "down," and ends by breaking the plaque over Don's head. The Sportsmen sing "Down Yonder".
Rochester has won a gin rummy game with Jack, so he is golfing while Jack does the housework. Jack plays gin rummy with Don, and he ends up doing the housework. Dennis arrives to sing his new song, Let there be love. Jack goes to the supermarket. He has trouble getting a basket loose; he is insulted by Frank Nelson and buys fruit from Benny Rubin; he keeps an eye out for a bargain, such as the alphabet soup which has been marked down because it is in Latin.
Jack goes to a nightclub. The Sportsmen Quartet sing 'When my sugar walks down the street.' The next act is a hypnotist; Jack scoffs, so the hypnotist suggests that when he leaves the stage he will think he is Diamond Jim Brady, 'the world's greatest spendthrift.' When Jack comes back angry about the results, the hypnotist makes him think he is Bob Hope.
Jack goes to a gym so that he can improve his physique and impress a young lady; Don goes with him.
Mamie Van Doren uses her feminine wiles to get Jack to let her sing on the program; Dennis gets mad, so they end by singing a duet: 'You make me feel so young.' Don Wilson and Howard McNear do the State Farm commercial. After everyone has left, Jack picks up a book entitled Life in the death house, or My last meal had no appeal. He begins a daydream in which he is a condemned man who tells the Warden his tale.
Jack's monologue is about the freeways. The sketch is the same as the one done on October 4, 1953.
Jack and Rochester are cleaning Jack's attic; Jack can't stand to throw anything away. Don arrives, and finds an abstract painting in which he claims to see a man in a car who is happy because he has State Farm Car Insurance. Rochester finds a box of papers that contains Jack's application to medical school. Rochester daydreams about what Benny would have been like as a surgeon.
Dennis comes on in squeaky shoes and sings 'It's almost like being in love.' In the sketch, Jack plays an N.Y.P.D. police detective trying to get a confession from a gangster.
The Third Grade class of Beverly Hills Elementary School puts on its version of the Jack Benny program. For the commercial, a man who has just had a minor accident knocks on Jack's door, asks to use the phone, and proceeds to make a long distance call to State Farm Insurance in Michigan.
Jack has hired only two of the Mills Brothers; because the two of them can't sing well, they ask the other two to come out and sing anyway. Their agent shoots himself backstage. They do the Lipton Tea commercial with Don to the tune of 'Up the lazy river.' In the sketch, Jack goes to Las Vegas and drives the hotel staff crazy with his stinginess.
Rochester wants to compete in the Al Jarvis Dance Contest for the $500 prize, but Jack tells him he has already had his night off this month. Jack cancels dinner with the Wilsons in order to compete himself, then arrives at the Wilsons for dinner afterwards at 2 a.m., and complains about the food.
'George Burns' crashes Jack's variety show, which features two songs sung by Ann-Margret and juggler extraordinaire, Francis Brunn.
Jack's monologue is on TV channel switchers. In the sketch, Jack returns from a three day hike with the Beverly Hills Beavers to find that Rochester has given an old sports jacket with $200 sewn in the lining to the Main Street Shelter. Jack rushes down to retrieve it, but in his camping clothes and with a three-day beard, he is taken for a transient himself. When he finally gets his $200 back, his 'alter ego' makes him donate it to the Shelter.
Jack's monologue is about contact lenses. It is interrupted by two photographers from What's new in television magazine who want to take his picture. Benny introduces Peter Lawford, and they talk about being between pictures. The sketch is similar to the one done on May 2, 1954; Lawford plays the husband, Dors, the wife, and Benny her lover.
Filmed in New York City. Jack explains he is in New York to sign his new contract. He introduces Phil Silvers from the audience, and Phil comes up and upstages Jack. Don comes out to do the commercial, and Jack interrupts him to put wigs on him. Betty Johnson sings 'My kind of guy.' In the sketch, Jack arrives at his sponsor's office to sign his contract, and is asked to wait. Meanwhile, the sponsor is with Silvers, who is trying to replace Jack. Phil hides in the closet. Jack discovers him, along with Garry Moore, Alan King, and Jack Paar, who were also after Jack's job. 9
Jack, whose rooster is bothering the neighbors, receives a summons. He goes to a lawyer (Frank Nelson) who learned the law by watching Perry Mason. He tells Jack to plead insanity. Jack goes home, where he finds Don and a Hawaiian princess, who does the commercial with hula movements. Jack falls asleep and dreams he is on trial for murdering the rooster. Perry Mason defends him very badly, and in the end breaks down in the courtroom and confesses that he himself killed the bird.
Jack and his girlfriend Cindy plan to go to a play with Don, but Don calls to say he can't make it. Jack calls the Stewarts to invite them to go instead, and they accept, mistaking him for Jack Lemmon. Outside the theater, Jack encounters a bum begging for a dime for a cup of tea; Jack gives him a Lipton teabag. It turns out Jack's free passes are no good on the week-end. The Stewarts, trying to escape from Jack, say they need to shop for a lamp, so Jack insists on taking them to a tacky auction where they can get free donuts.
In his monologue, Jack talks about the boys in his orchestra. When Jack starts to introduce his guest star, he discovers that everyone on his crew but him knows that Tennessee Ernie Ford will be appearing by remote from Lakeport, Calif. Fred de Cordova shows Jack how the remote unit works. Ernie appears in his barn, talks about farming, sings "John Henry" and then his image blacks out. "We lost him." Don does the commercial with a man on a pogo stick who is jumping for joy because he just took out State Farm Car Insurance. The remote picture comes back, but Ernie isn't in it. One of his peapickers comes in (a beautiful girl). Ernie claims to have developed a square egg. Jack and Ernie play a fiddle duet of "Sweet Georgia Brown" on split screen with television engineers in voice over; first they lose both of them, then Jack is in the barn and Ernie is on the stage, then both appear upside down.
Nobody in Jack's club wants to play golf with him because he is such a bad sport. He manages to make up a foursome consisting of the golf pro and two out-of-towners, but they become exasperated with his cheating. Don does the Lipton Tea commercial in the locker-room with Dr. Scott who has been called to the phone because of an emergency: his wife is out of Lipton Tea.
Guest star Bobby Rydell sings "Sitting On Top Of The World," and "Toot Toot Tootsie Goodbye." After the show, Jack is followed home, and a rock is thrown through his window. The rock thrower turns out to be Dennis, who is mad at Jack because Bobby sang instead of Dennis Day. Jack decides to take the law into his own hands, when he punishes Dennis.
In the opening segment, Jack practices his lines on the bus on the way to the rehearsal for his show. While Don and the director are waiting for Jack to arrive, Jane Morgan sings "The Second Time Around." When Jack arrives, he flirts with Jane, then invites her to lunch. Don does the Lipton Tea commercial with a parrot that does so well Jack fires Don. Jack takes Jane to lunch at a cafeteria. He and Jane rehearse their lines for a skit about a fight between a husband and a wife; everyone in the cafeteria takes sides, and a brawl ensues.
Jack cleans out his desk and finds a song he wrote 15 years ago, entitled "When you say I beg your pardon, then I'll come back to you." Film composer Dimitri Tiomkin is coming over in the evening at Jack's request, so that he can get permission to use the music from High Noon in a sketch on his program, and Jack decides to ask him to arrange the song he wrote himself, so that it will be a big hit. At home, locksmiths arrive to open his vault, and Don comes by to practice ventriloquism in a State Farm commercial. Tiomkin arrives with his dog, and Jack plays his song on the violin with disastrous results.
Jack takes his microphone into the audience to talk with them. Frank Nelson is there with his wife. Don Wilson conducts an applause test of three Santa Clauses for the Lipton Tea commercial. Jack and his cast and crew exchange presents.
In a flashback, Jack remembers his last New Year's Eve. The sketch is very similar to the one done on December 27, 1953. In Jack's dressing room, Dennis sings "An Irishman will steal your heart away." Dennis and Don, playing the tuba, do the State Farm commercial.
The monologue is about TV make-up. Jack introduces Roberta Peters, who sings the "Shadow song" from Dinorah by Meyerbeer. At Jack's home, after the show, Don threatens to quit because Jack cut the Lipton Tea commercial from the show, but decides not to when Jack confiscates his Lipton teabag. Rochester makes Jack a fried egg sandwich without leaving the living room, using his extendable hand. Jack plays a record Peters has given him and daydreams about singing a scene from La Traviata with her.
Jack plans a surprise birthday costume party for Dennis, who comes over to Jack's house early, when no one is around, and finds out. Dennis gives himself away when he arrives at party time in a leprechaun costume.
In the monologue Jack announces that he has been given a one-way ticket to Australia by the Musician's Union so he can give violin concerts there. Dennis sings 'Make someone happy.' Don comes out with the messenger who is delivering Jack's passport; in his pouch he carries a Lipton teabag and a cup. Jack reminisces about the red tape he had to go through to get a work permit in London.
Dennis sings 'It's a grand night for singing.' In the sketch, Jack reminisces to a reporter about how he met Rochester. In flashback, Rochester is the porter on a train on which Jack is trying to smuggle Don and Dennis to New York without paying their fares. Rochester is fired for not turning Jack in, and Jack hires him as his butler.
Because Jack is late so often, Frederick de Cordova and Don are rehearsing with Jack's stand-in, Charlie, who looks nothing like him. When Jack finally arrives, the stand-in criticizes Jack's entrance. The rehearsal is interrupted by a phone call from Rochester who announces that the Maxwell has been stolen. Don rehearses the Lipton Flow-Through Teabag commercial with Charlie. At the Beverly Hills Police Station, Jack is reminded of the sumptuousness and refinement of the station. Rochester is interrogated. Eventually the car is found; it has been returned to Jack's house by the thieves.
Jack and Gisele take a shortcut while driving from Phoenix to L.A., get lost, and find themselves in a cafe in a ghost town. The cafe owner tells them a story about Tombstone Harry and Cactus Kid (Benny); the sketch is very similar to the one done on November 2, 1952, with Gisele playing the saloon singer. Don Wilson, Gisele and the Sportsmen Quartet do the State Farm commercial to the tune of 'An old cowhand from the Rio Grande.'
Benny's monologue is interrupted by the audience with their chants of "We want Rock!" Hudson and Benny compare the effects of their kisses on a blindfolded young lady. In the sketch, Jack does an impressive impression of Jack Paar in a take-off of his Tonight Show. Paar's actual announcer/sidekick Hugh Downs appears as himself. Benny/Paar brings out his first guest, young harmonica-playing, Twist-teaching dance instructor Irving Hudson. Jack suggests he change his name to Rock: Irving Rock. The sketch with everyone learning "The Twist" from Hudson.
Jack opens the show playing his violin, but is interrupted by a young girl wanting his autograph. She plays the violin better, so Jack sends her away and introduces Julie London who sings and flirts with Jack. Later the girl comes back on stage and she and Jack close the show with a violin duet. Guest star: Toni Marcus.
Jack falls asleep and dreams that he is Alexander Hamilton. Dennis Day plays Aaron Burr.
Jack is in his office, having his hair cut by Rochester. Freddie de Cordova tells Benny there are too many acts in his annual variety show, so there is no time for Shari Lewis. Jack is notary public for the building, and models underwear for a Midwestern catalog. Two window-washers who appear to be making a pass at his secretaries actually just want some Lipton Tea. When Shari and Lambchop arrive, Shari is so charming and enthusiastic, Jack can't bear to tell her he has to cancel her. The choreographer comes in and needs a piano player to help him make a point; Shari volunteers. Eventually it is revealed that she plays the piano, dances, sings and does magic, changing a one dollar bill into a two dollar bill, so it is cheaper to hire her and get rid of all the other acts. She and Jack play "Alabammy Bound" on piano and violin. Shari also plays the violin and is a notary public.
Jack is late for the show because he has used a cut-rate airline, so Dennis takes over. Don and Dennis sing the State Farm Insurance commercial to the tune of "Side By Side."
Jack believes Billy Wilder wants him to star in his next picture.
Dennis sings 'On the First Warm Day.' After being interviewed for an article on his life story, Jack daydreams about what he would have done had he not left home to go into show business: he would have given violin lessons.
Jack gives Mickey Rooney free tickets to his show, and then tricks him into appearing as his guest star. After discussing the trend the prison system is taking, Jack and Mickey do a sketch on what a prison will look like in 1985: a luxury resort.
Jack advertises for a boarder and gets a series of strange applicants. Cousin Emmy and her Kinfolk play country music with Don for the State Farm commercial.
Frank Sinatra, Jr. sings 'My kind of girl.' Don and his son Harlow appear; it's Harlow's 19th birthday. Jack and Harlow snipe at each other while Don does the Jell-O commercial. In the sketch, Jack, Harlow and Frank Sinatra, Jr. play typical teenagers, at home and at the soda shop, topping it off with the rock and roll rendition of 'She has a wig, contact lenses and a nose job.'
In the dressing room before the show, Jack calls for a barber, who turns out to be a nut and a Phil Silvers fan. Silvers has been complaining about coming on so late in the show. Jack discovers his pants are missing. Silvers comes on stage in Jack's pants to introduce the show. He goes through Jack's pants pockets. Jack comes out wearing Don's pants, and goes through Don's pockets. Don does the State Farm Insurance commercial in an angry voice. In the sketch, Jack tells of his first encounter with Phil Silvers, when he shows up on Jack's doorstep with a note from Jack's Aunt Sadie asking Jack to help Phil get started in show business. He mooches off Jack, plays the clarinet at 4 a.m., and sells Jack's violin to get money to play poker with his friends in Jack's living room, until Aunt Sadie comes to visit, and doesn't recognize Silvers.
Benny instructs Raymond Burr how to be a comedian and Burr practices exaggerated comic antics. In the sketch, Burr enacts a scene from an Air Force drama, and Benny redoes it as a comedy.
In the sketch, Benny tries to conduct Welk's orchestra. He persuades Welk and the orchestra to play the song he wrote, 'When you say I beg your pardon, then I'll come back to you.' Welk turns it into a polka, and the audience dances with Welk and Jack.
Benny introduces Darla Hood, and talks with her about her work on the Our Gang comedies. She sings 'It's a most unusual day.' In the sketch, she plays her old Our Gang role, while Jack plays Alfalfa, Don Wilson plays Spankie, Rochester plays Buckwheat, and Dennis plays the rich kid.
Burnett sings 'Clang went the trolley.' In the sketch, Jack plays Tarzan, Burnett plays Jane, and Harlow plays their son.
Broadcast November 27, 1962: Romi Yamada and Jack Soo from "Flower Drum Song" (and later "Barney Miller") are the guests. Romi performs a song in Japanese and Jack wants to book her for more appearances — at a very cheap price. Her agent begs to differ. Jack Soo hosts a Japanese version of The Ed Sullivan Show. Guests include the Rocky Fellers playing "Long Tall Sally" with vocalist Jack in a wig and gold lamé suit. Mel Blanc is the mike-boom operator who can't stay awake.
Jack and Bob do a comedy routine. The sketch is similar to the one done on the show of February 24, 1957: Hope and Benny play a pair of vaudevillians trying to get a job, and in the agent's office several other vaudeville acts are demonstrated, including a young boy who imitates Jimmy Durante.
Several star's wives are planning a charity benefit in Beverley Hills, trying hard not to invite Jack, but he insinuates himself, unasked, into the event. He wanted to play his violin, but the only spot open is to referee a championship wrestling match, which he takes, but bungles it up so he gets involved in the wrestling, too.
Jack encounters nothing but headaches trying to make a flight to New York. He catches a taxi from his home and contends with an emotional cabbie (Louis Nye), who cries uncontrollably because he always hates saying goodbye at the airport. Once inside, he encounters the Mexican Sy (the one with a sister named Sue who sews), a painter who can't spell the sponsor's name correctly, outrageous announcements on the P.A. system, and the always-sarcastic Frank Nelson behind a counter.
Benny conducts a talent show, featuring: Mel Blanc as Mr. Finque who does imitations of animals; Don Wilson, who impersonates Ted Lewis singing 'Me and My Shadow,' with his son Harlow as the shadow (the JELL-O commercial); the Renaudi Brothers, one of whom is the fastest human being in the world, and dodges three of the bullets fired by his brother, before being killed by the last five; and the Sentimental Sweethearts, who turn out to be the orchestra from the Jack Benny Fan Club, Pasadena Chapter.
Jack reminisces meeting Max Bygraves at a show in England 8 years before only to find he's copying Jack's routine
Jack returns to his house, but no one knows him. Rod Serling guest stars as Mr. Zone, the mayor of a town which was named after him. Jack runs out screaming.
Peter Lorre sings during the opening monologue. Joanie Sommers follows with a song. Jack dreams about a visit to the doctors office where he's in the waiting room with Peter Lorre, who happens to be in the front page of the newspaper for murdering 6 people. The doctor, who is a plastic surgeon is played by Mel Blanc. Peter Lorre holds Jack and Mel hostage so he can change his appearance. Peter Lorre's operation is a success! He now looks like Jack!
Dick Van Dyke says that he has been warned that Jack "works his guests to death." In the skit, Jack plays an inspector investigating a murder who questions everyone in the house - all played by Dick Van Dyke.
Jack's opening monologue is interrupted by a picture taking family who join him onstage. In the sketch, Jack and Rochester are leaving on a personal appearance tour, so Jack rents his house while he is gone. The renters are suprised by some of Jack's conditions for rental.
Rita Moreno sings and guest stars in a skit about a little Spanish town.
Jack and Guest star Connie Francis to a skit on the career of Stephen Foster.
Having Martha Tilton as a guest causes him to reminisce about when they worked together with the USO during World War Two, on the island of New Guinea. During the show, Jack performs his stand-up, then starts playing his violin, when the sirens sound and enemy planes start bombing, everyone runs off but jack keeps playing. Eventually two Japanese soldiers, all that's left after a hari-kiri wave, surrender if he'll stop playing.
Jack attends Frankie Avalon's record session, but constantly interrupts the takes. Eventually, he's given a role in the recording.
Jack is kidnapped and held for $10,000 ransom. When Don and Dennis don't believe him, his kidnappers accompany him to the bank—where employees are astonished to hear he wants to make a withdrawal.
After Jack and Don argue over who said "Don't give up the ship," Jack fires Don and holds auditions for a new announcer. Dennis does the JELL-O commercial as a series of imitations, including James Cagney and John F. Kennedy. Dennis rehearses a sentimental song for Jack, while Don walks back and forth across the set clearing out his office.
Dennis wants to do his Elvis Presley imitation, but Jack won't let him. Don does the commercial with his son Harlow. The sketch is Jack's version of The Mikado, ruined by Dennis doing his Elvis imitation in his Japanese costume.
Jack devotes the program to answering request letters from his viewers. One viewer asks about sound effects on his radio program, so he asks Ray Erlenborn to demonstrate; he makes the sounds of horses' hooves, a parade of marching soldiers, the milking of a cow, and a fight between Jack and John Wayne. For the State Farm Car Insurance commercial, Jack invites a serviceman up from the audience, who claims State Farm insured his tank in the Battle of the Bulge. Dennis sings a country western song. Jack's sister Florence has written in asking why he never gives Dennis or Don a chance to work alone; they do a Laurel and Hardy imitation. The last request is that Jack play a piece of serious music. Unfortunately, the accompanist sent over at the last minute by the Musicians' Union completely upstages Jack with his comic antics.
Season opener. Don, Jack and Dennis do the commercial as Peter, Paul and Mary. At Billy Graham's request, the skit is redone according to a new formula in which there are no insults to anyone, and everyone is quiet and sweet; Dennis reports that he went to UCLA over the summer. Billy Graham gives a short inspirational message.
Jack makes his entrance from the opposite side of the stage, and stands with his back to the audience out of force of habit. Don rolls out a carpet, and Goulet comes out vacuuming it—he had failed to read the fine print on his contract. Goulet tells about growing up in Canada, tells a Nelson Eddy joke, discusses playing nightclubs with Jack, and sings, This is all I ask. Jack questions Goulet’s reputation as a ladies’ man, leading into the sketch: in flashback, Jack sees Goulet and his girl at a Hollywood nightclub; his girl makes a pass at Jack. Later we learn that in fact Jack’s girl made a pass at Goulet.
Don, Carol and Jack make their entrance jumping through large doorways covered with paper; Jack can't break through and Carol has to do it for him. Jack and Carol talk about her desire to become a director, and she makes some suggestions about his show. She sings "Sweet Georgia Brown." In the sketch, Jack, Don, and Carol play riverboat card sharks out to cheat each other.
In the monologue, Jack discusses the writing of his autobiography. He introduces Clint Walker, saying they both have a lot in common: both were born in Illinois, joined the Navy and have blue eyes. Clint Walker sings The Navajo Trail. Clint mentions that they are casting for his twin brother in his new picture. Don comes out with a table on wheels, and demonstrates that he can eat a whole meal, and still have room for JELL-O. In the sketch, Jack, in elevator shoes, auditions for Clint Walker's twin brother; he watches a prior applicant rehearse a scene in which the twin brother is beaten up, and decides he doesn't want the part after all. Remake of the sketch done Sept. 21, 1958 with Gary Cooper.
Jack gives Johnny Carson advice on how to run the Tonight show. Johnny does card tricks, plays the drums, sings and dances to Ballin' the Jack. They do a mock version of the Tonight show with Jack as Johnny's guest. Don Wilson does a man-on-the-street interview for the commercial.
Jack hears on the morning talk show 'This is Hollywood' that James and Gloria Stewart are making a movie together. He decided to go to the studio to wish them good luck. On the set, he ruins take after take, then tries to take over direction of the film; sketch is similar to the one done on March 9, 1958.
Ed Sullivan is nervous about doing "His first Dramatic part" on the show, but he gets into the spirit playing an attorney defending a French girl accused of murder. The case seems to be stacked against district attorney Jack when the entire jury are beret-and-smock wearing,baguette-wielding Frenchmen.
At the library, Jack has a note from his doctor excusing him from his fourteen cent overdue fine. Dennis is checking out Veblen and Gibbon—he has to walk by UCLA on his way home, and doesn't want to look stupid. Jack recommends that Dennis read Robinson Crusoe. Don comes in with news of State Farm Insurance; Jack tries to tell him to be quiet, but the librarian says, "Let him talk, stupid." In the sketch, Jack plays Robinson Crusoe and Dennis plays Friday. Includes references to Rain and The Lawrence Welk Show.
The sketch is the same as the one done on Sept. 13, 1953. Jack is waiting for his ship to depart for Los Angeles after his Hawaiian vacation. Everyone is given a lei except him. Slepperman appears and gives him one made of chicken livers. Rochester arrives late because he has been crowned King Kameamea VI by the islanders. On board, Dennis appears; he tells Jack he swam all the way to Hawaii, then jumps overboard to swim home. Jack falls asleep and dreams he has a shipboard romance with Jayne Mansfield. Jayne sings "You're just too marvellous for words," and Jack wakes to discover he has just kissed an overweight woman passenger.
Jack is working on a Julius Caesar sketch, while being pursued by an amorous female fan. Don does the State Farm commercial as an encounter with an admirer who thinks State Farm is terrific because it paid for his car accident even though he wasn't insured with them. Dennis wants to take over the show for a few weeks, so he hires a Benny impersonator to make phone calls in Benny's name, and thus make Jack think he is going crazy; Jack winds up on the mental ward of the hospital.
Jack's monologue is about golfing. He calls up a man from the audience who turns out to be a TV statistician, and tells Jack he has told 80,000 jokes and gotten 30,000 laughs. Dennis comes out to say he quits because Jack has called him stupid 2,000 times. In the sketch, Don, Jack and Dennis play the Three Musketeers: Jackels, Donnels and Dennells.
Jack hosts an amateur talent contest with a barefoot tap dancer, an acrobat and his dog, a drunk acrobat, and a Mexican musical group led by Mel Blanc. Benny and Jessel do a skit.
Jack asks two members of the audience to read the commercial, while he does sound effects. Benny plays the violin. The audience sings 'Auld lang syne.' Mary calls Jack to congratulate him on doing the whole show by himself without any supporting cast, and to ask him to take out the garbage when he gets home.
Jack and his long-time best friend George Burns play golf, but Jack quickly storms back to his office, crying foul to his secretary. George strolls in next, smoking a victory cigar, causing Jack to flee again. So, George makes himself at home at Jack's desk, and relates to Jack's secretary Ms. Gordon, how he met Jack 40 years before, in a cheap Chicago rooming house.
Peter, Paul and Mary sing Blowin' in the Wind, and a folk song about Jack. In the sketch, Jack has invited them to his house, where he asks them to record a song he wrote.
Nat King Cole sings "Day in, day out," and "When I fall in love." In the sketch Jack plays his violin with his band members, while 5-year-old Jimmy Bradley plays the drums.
Jack thinks Bobby Darin would be just the person to play him in a film based on his life.
Benny monologue. Miss Beverly Hills sings "Only one man," and does strip. In skit, Don pretends to break his leg so that his son Harlow can have his big chance. Harlow reads "Ode to California."
Jack explains that it is because of long shots that he manages to look so good on television year after year; in close-up he is covered with wrinkles. Dennis comes out with a palm tree because Jack never gives him any scenery, and sings 'Cocktails for two.' Don does the State Farm Car Insurance commercial with the yodelling owner of a Swiss chalet. In the sketch, Jack remembers how he found Dennis and hired him to sing on his radio show. After hearing a recording of Dennis' voice, incomplete because Dennis had run out of quarters for the machine, Jack sets out to find him, going from one job to another at which Dennis has been fired. He finally locates him working in the kitchen of a Chinese restaurant.
Coming home from his show, Jack receives a message to call a Dr. Johnson. The doctor asks him to come right over. Dr. Johnson is a psychiatrist who has found a man with amnesia who keeps repeating Jack's name. Jack identifies the amnesia victim as Professor Le Blanc, his old violin teacher; in flashback, we see he has gone crazy because Jack plays so badly. To cure Le Blanc, Jack plays his violin beautifully, and Le Blanc, realizing he is not a failure as a violin teacher, recovers. Jack asks the doctor not to reveal that he is such a good violinist because he has made so much money as a bad one.
Don introduces Jack wrapped as a gift to the television audience, unwrapped by two beautiful dancers, but the box is empty; Jack is afraid of the dark. Jack spends the program answering requests from viewers. One viewer asks that Dennis sing 'Love in bloom,' but Dennis doesn't know it. Another asks that Jack give Harlow a break, so Jack lets Harlow do his imitation of Sophie Tucker for the State Farm commercial. Another asks that Jack put her husband's wild animal act on; he is eaten by his lion. Instead of having Jackie Gleason back, as requested, Jack does an impersonation of him; Dennis does Crazy Guggenheim. Then Benny announces he is going to do his impersonation of Danny Kaye, and Danny Kaye appears. The last request is that Jack play one classical number on his violin straight through without jokes, but the lion drives him off the stage.
Jack daydreams that he is fight manager for Kid Dynamite (Dennis Day).
Jack rehearses some Dixieland music on his violin with members of his band. Then he does some public service announcements, including one on safe driving; a close-up of his driver's license reveals it has expired. He and Don go to the California Dept. of Motor Vehicles to renew his license. While there, Don buys (from a con man/ventriloquist) a parrot that sings about State Farm Insurance.
Jack's guests, the pop singing group The Lettermen, provoke surprisingly strong reactions from Jack Benny and his regular singer Dennis Day. They bump Dennis from singing on the show at all, so he skulks behind the scenery as the Phantom of the Comedy. Jack, The Waukegan Wizard, claims he earned a high school letter as a cheerleader, but regrets he didn't attend college, so the World's Oldest Freshman enrolls with The Lettermen.
After the show, Jack calls a meeting in his dressing room to ask the cast and crew not to make so many mistakes. They point out that he, too, made mistakes on the show; for example, he kept scratching his arm. Don does the State Farm commercial over again to ask Jack where he could have possibly made a mistake; Jack points out that this week they were on for General Foods. Jack decides he has been scratching his arm because of a skin allergy, and visits several allergists. He eventually discovers that he is allergic to Dennis.
Don has arranged for Harlow to take the sponsor's daughter on a date. Unfortunately, Harlow has never been on a date before.
Jack discusses the ability of radio to paint pictures in the mind, and Mel Blanc demonstrates his various voices. Jack and Dennis redo the sketch from Jan. 27 1957, in which Jack plays the Fiddler.
Huntley and Brinkley open the show with a newscast on Benny's move to NBC, the network which used to carry his radio program, for this opening show of the season. Jack's monologue also concerns his move to NBC. Dennis brings his wife and nine children on stage. Don does the commercial. In the sketch, Jack meets with NBC executives and discovers that his new studio is a radio studio. Doug McClure and Roberta Shore from the Virginians make a cameo appearance. Then Jack does a sketch with the Marquis Chimps, in which they dress like the Beatles and sing 'I want to hold your hand' with Jack.
Jack receives a visit from his next-door neighbor, Lucille Ball. Lucy recounts her version of Paul Revere's ride, and a sketch unfolds with Jack as a gallivanting Revere, Lucy as his jealous wife Rachel, and Don Wilson as Washington.
Jack and his guest Andy Williams perform at the gala grand opening of a meat market. Andy sings "On the street where you live."
Two IRS agents visit Jack. They can't understand how he could have earned 375,000 dollars, and spent only 19 dollars on entertainment. Since one declared item was 3.90 (three dollars and ninety cents) to take Mr. and Mrs. Jimmy Stewart to dinner, they next visit the Stewarts. The Stewarts reveal that on the occasion in question, Jack saw them at their favorite restaurant, made them sit at his table with his waitress/girlfriend, told them he would pay, and then at the end generously let the Stewarts pay the whole bill so they could have the tax deduction. The 3.90 was for cleaning his suit after Gloria Stewart dumped the salad on his head.
When Bob Hope drops by, Jack comes up with what he's convinced is a great idea: The two should team up to cut a comedy record album.
In his monologue, Jack reveals that his producer has been using raffle tickets to get the audience to stay in their seats until the end of the program. He introduces Connie Francis, and they argue about whether it is harder to sing or to get laughs. She sings "I was born too late," an Al Jolson medley ("Swanee," "Mammy," and "April showers"). Don does the Alka-Seltzer commercial as an endorsement by a safe-cracker. In the sketch, Benny, Stevens, Dale White and Don Wilson play members of the Skinner family of the Ozarks. They all sing a parody of "Sit right down and write yourself a letter." This sketch is a remake of the "Ah, Wilderness" radio program of May 16, 1937.
Don introduces the show by announcing that the show must go on; Jack is brought out in traction in a hospital bed. Abbe Lane sings 'I believe in you.' Don says he needs his glasses to do the State Farm commercial; when he finds them, they include a funny nose and a State Farm sign. In the sketch, Benny plays a scientist living deep in the jungle trying to develop a non-skid banana peel. Abbe Lane plays his beautiful wife, who is sick of the rain, and Dennis plays his new assistant, Lawrence of Africa.
Jack's guests play three women from the Beverly Hills Improvement Committee who conspire to rid the city of Benny's Maxwell auto by holding a raffle and selling Jack the only ticket, so that he will win a replacement auto.
At a poker game at Jack's house with members of the band, Don and Dennis, the talk is all of the cat burglar terrorizing Beverly Hills celebrities. The State Farm commercial is heard on Dennis' radio. After the guests leave, it is revealed that Jack has been hypnotized into acting as a cat burglar, dressed up in a cat costume.
Rochester finally manages to get Jack to give him a week off by telling him how much he needs and deserves a vacation. While relaxing at the Palm Valley Inn with his friend Roy, he reads an ad for domestic help put in the paper by Jack. Don and Dennis come to Rochester's aid; discovering that Jack has already hired a housekeeper, they try to scare her off.
Jack's guests are comic Louis Nye and singer Wayne Newton, who describes how he was discovered at a benefit that was raising money to send "underprivileged" Beverly Hills children to camp--on the French Riviera. Newton sings 'You're nobody till somebody loves you,' 'Falling in love,' and 'When the saints go marching in.'
One of the alligators that guards Jack's secret vault falls ill, so Jack calls in a veterinarian.
Jack's usual amateur show: Mel Blanc plays the drunken bottle-player; Dennis Day plays a Japanese in a Beatle outfit who sings 'I want to hold your hand;' The Guire Sisters do their singing act.
Jack Does a solo show and while going out to the audience her asks Gisele Mackenzie To sing a song.
Guest Jack Jones sings 'Bewitched, bothered and bewildered,' and 'I need a girl.' In the sketch, Benny plays the principal of Benedict Arnold High School, and Jones is a moonlighting teacher working as a car washer.
In the opening monologue, Jack shows the audience why his Stradivarius is worth $30,000. He introduces Milton Berle and they spar a bit. Don introduces Miss Carmelita Montoya, a dancer from Madrid who uses One-a-Day Brand Vitamins for castanets. The sketch is about Jonathan Goodheart (Jack), wealthy philanthropist who believes there is no such thing as a bad boy, but his newly adopted son (Berle) gives him cause to wonder.
In the sketch, the Kingston Trio join prisoner Benny in the Tijuana jail. The Kingstons sing 'Tijuana Jail' and 'I'm going home.'
The show opens with the audience in line to see the show comparing notes on how they got their tickets. Jack's monologue is about his trip to Australia. He introduces Australian singer Luray Dudman(?) who sings 'Wouldn't it be loverly.' Jack and Luray compare the U.S. and Australia. Don asks Luray whether you lose or gain a day when you cross the international date line on the way to Australia; he is concerned because he doesn't want to miss a One-a-Day Vitamin. Luray asks how Jack first got the idea of using the Marquis Chimps on his show. In the sketch, Jack remembers the first visit he paid Detroy after seeing the act in Las Vegas.
Jack introduces cameraman Charlie Summers and his new wife from the audience; she asks why Charlie has never had a raise. Jack's guest is Stuart Canin, who, as a 10-year-old violin prodigy, could play the Bee better than Jack and did so on Fred Allen's show. He is now Professor of Violin at Oberlin. He plays Vida breve by Manuel de Falla on the Stradivarius. Don Wilson introduces a man with a rocket pack, radar, a telephone, a direction finder, and a record player who wants to be a State Farm agent. In the sketch, Jack plays the violin-maker Antonio Stradivari, whose wife complains that he could make more money by turning out his violins at a faster clip. Jack and Canin play the Bee in duet.
Jack's monologue concerns TV ratings. He is interrupted by a member of the audience from Toledo who wants to take a picture of his family with Jack. Don does the One-A-Day Brand Vitamins commercial with one member of the family. Dennis sings 'Chicago is my kind of town.' In the sketch, Jack plays a Sultan visiting one of his villages. Jack's crew had devised a flying carpet that was supposed to fly, but it fails to do so; to cover up, a troop of acrobats takes over; Jack, worried about being upstaged, goes out to stop them, and is incorporated in their act. The show ends with Jack hanging from the stage rigging about 15 feet off the ground.
Rochester explains the rules to the new housekeeper; the main one is that they must watch Benny's show. In Benny's monologue, he explains how he keeps fit, and announces that the American Federation of Musicians has given him a one-way ticket to Australia. Dennis Day sings the State Farm Insurance jingle, and then "If ever I would leave you," to a running commentary by Rochester and the maid. Rochester tells her about the time Benny fired Dennis Day: in flashback to the radio days, Dennis suggests they all drive to Palm Springs for the weekend, where it rains the whole time.
Jack brings his aging guard up from his underground vault for the first time in years.
At the rehearsal for his show, Jack keeps making mistakes. Don does the State Farm commercial with a drum covered with paper: you can't beat State Farm. Because Jack has been complaining that he is working too hard, the Programming Department has found a double for him; however, the sponsor must never know, and they decide they must fool Rochester if they want to fool the sponsor.
Jack's first partner, who worked with Jack as a variety team in the Navy, is retiring. He wants to hold Jack to a promise made forty years ago that they would work together again when he got out. Jack tries him out on his show, but he can't say his lines, and his old routines are too corny.
The show opens with Jack's publicity agent and a photographer posing photos of Jack, first as a Beatle (for a younger image), and then as a frogman and as a surfer (to depict Benny as a man of action). Dennis sings 'There'll be music' while Don plays the piano. When the photographer poses Don and asks him to think of the most exciting thing in the world, Don gives a bigger smile thinking of State Farm Insurance. When Dennis mentions that he cashes his check at the gas station, Jack takes him to the bank to open an account. There he visits his private safety deposit vault, which is guarded much like his vault at home.
Jack is berating his publicity agent for not getting him dignified publicity, when the agent gets a phone call informing him that Ronald Reagan won't be able to make his scheduled appearance on the Impromptu panel discussion show. Jack insists that his agent get him on the show. Dennis arrives looking for a ruby lost from his ring; he thinks he has found it, but he has found a One-a-Day Brand Vitamin, allowing Don to do the commercial. On the show, Jack can't think of anything to say on various intellectual topics, until a question is asked about the affect on the American dollar of the fall of the British pound; Jack is still talking about money after the final credits have gone on, and the camera has been turned off.
Jack picks up his new, expensive, tailor-made suit in Beverly Hills. A State Farm claims person shows up in the store before an auto accident outside the store has even happened. Benny wears his new suit to his sponsor's home for dinner, where it is ruined by his sponsor's dog
The Smothers Brothers introduce the show trying to sing "Love in Bloom." Later, they sing "Boil that cabbage down" and "I never will marry." The sketch is set in London in 1944, after an air raid. Jack has been trapped under an unexploded bomb, and the Smothers Brothers play the bomb defusing squad.
Show Business at War is a short film made by The March of Time in 1943 to tout the United States film industry's contribution to the Second World War effort. It was a collaboration between several studios, directors and actors.
Various CBS stars appear in this one hour variety program about the opening of the brand new $7 million dollar CBS Television City Studios. With Gracie Allen, Eddie 'Rochester' Anderson, George Burns, Jack Benny, Eve Arden, Lucille Ball, Desi Arnaz
Hollywood turns out for a benefit for Easter Seals, the association collecting donations to aide medical research into diseases crippling children. Interspersed with the donation pitches are musical numbers performed by popular recording artists of the 1950s. The half-hour program aired without commercial interruption
with Jack Benny, Liberace & Jayne Mansfield, Vincent Price
On Feb 13, 1958, "Shower of Stars" presented this gala celebration of Jack Benny's (gasp) 40th birthday. Despite the fact that it's all a gag, the list of performers who turned out to pay tribute to Jack is astounding, including most of the major performers who had been part of his program going all the way back to his debut on radio. Even Mary Livingstone shows up, in what I believe is her only appearance ever on a live television broadcast (by this point in her life, Mary was terrified of appearing in front of live audiences and only appeared in occasional pre-filmed episodes of the Benny TV show). Just about the only regular cast member not on the program is Eddie "Rochester" Anderson, who was too ill to participate (as Jack explains in the program). This is a fairly strange program, filled with bizarre musical tributes and overstuffed with guests. Supposedly broadcast live from the Coconut Grove, the restaurant is clearly a stage set (the show is announced as originating from "Television City in Hollywood"). There are also clearly segments that have been pre-filmed (e.g., the scene in Jack's bedroom); but what's really strange is that the entire program-- even the portions that appear to have been broadcast live-- uses an artificial laugh track to sweeten the audience response. If you have an ear for these things, you can't miss it. But how could there be laugh track sweetening on a live broadcast? Despite how big a deal is made of Jack Benny finally turning 40, his character predictably reverted to being perpetually 39 afterwards, with no reference ever made again to this nationally televised celebration.
Jack Benny Hour with guests Bob Hope, Mitzi Gaynor, Senor Wences and The Marquis Family
In this spoof of "The Jack Benny Program", a mouse with Jack Benny's personality and poor violin playing ability lives, along with a mouse version of Benny's valet, Eddie 'Rochester' Anderson, in a hole in a wall of Jack Benny's own home. Jack the rodent takes a mouse version of 'Mary Livingstone (I)' out to dinner, and the two unwittingly walk right into the disguised mouth of an orange cat!
Danny Thomas heckles Jack from the audience and the McGuire Sisters sing. Raymond Burr appears as Perry Mason in a sketch.
The town of Primrose, Arizona is beset by outlaws, so the towns people hire Fletcher Bissell III (A.K.A. The Silver Dollar Kid) as their new sheriff. Fletcher is so cowardly the townsfolk are sure that the local outlaws will be too proud to gun him down. This proves to be the case, and the outlaws hire their own cowardly gunfighter, Chicken Farnsworth, to go up against The Silver Dollar Kid. Starring Phil Silvers & Jack Benny
This special, originally aired September 27, 1961, is a one of a kind tribute to Jack Benny for the benefit concerts he performed all over the country to raise money for struggling orchestras. Through the course of his life, Jack said nothing gave him more pleasure in show business than these concerts, affording him the opportunity to play with the greatest symphonies in the world while helping them stay afloat financially. This largely musical special is overflowing with great performances, by Eugene Ormandy and the Philadelphia Symphony Orchestra, pianist Van Cliburn, violinist Isaac Stern and jazz clarinetist Benny Goodman. Video quality is very rough here, but this is still worth seeing as a very rare bit of Jack Benny history. The priceless concert footage here has hardly been seen since this special originally aired, and I'm not aware of any other video of Jack's symphony performances.
"Jack Benny in Australia" was originally a stage tour, in association with J.C. Williamson Theatres, opening in Melbourne at the Comedy Theatre on March 16 1964 before moving to Sydney and adapted as a television special featuring the original cast. Australian rock legend Johnny O'Keefe introduced a new hit song during this show's run, "She Wears My Ring", which later went to No. 1 nationally.
The Beach Boys appear in a skit with Benny and Hope as surfers. Jack trys to weasel Disneyland tickets from Walt Disney. Also, a skit with Benny, Hope and Sommer in a takeoff on Italian movies. This was Benny's first special after the demise of his regular series. Benny obviously trys to appeal to the younger viewers by booking the very popular Beach Boys.
Another skit with Mel Sy Blanc and the Tijuana Brass
Jack's back with the first of two specials he'll do this season. Joining him are madcap Phyllis Diller, singer-guitarist Trini Lopez and the Smothers Brothers, comedy folk singers. During the hour, Jack does a reprise of his famous 'si' routine with side-kick Mel Blanc playing the leader of a misfit Mariachi band asks Trini for a guitar lesson and presents his very own beauty pageant, a parody of every beauty contest you've ever seen. Highlights: Fly me to the moon, This train--Trini; I talk to the trees--Smothers; Spanish flea--band; Here she is, Miss Northern and Southern Hemisphere--Jack"--TV guide, December 1, 1966. In his opening monologue, Jack describes the negotiations with General Sarnoff of NBC concerning his pay for this show. Jack agrees to the deal when General Sarnoff allows him to return all of the empties from the Dean Martin rehearsals. Benny starts to talk about how he always wanted to have his own beauty pageant, and will be doing so tonight, when he is interrupted to have his picture taken with "the beauties"--which turn out to be American Motors' new cars; the photographer from Acme Photo is played by Frank Nelson. Benny introduces Trini Lopez, who sings Fly me to the moon. Benny talks with him about playing the guitar, then tries singing Fly me to the moon himself. Phyllis Diller runs out; she has volunteered to be the chaperone for the beauty pageant contestants but they are making her ill--they're too beautiful; she shows Jack how she thinks they should walk. Trini Lopez sings This train. Benny introduces the Smothers Brothers; Tommy gives an overly flowery speech, which, when chided, he modifes to "It's nice to be on your dumb show." They argue about who their mom liked best. While Dick is trying to introduce their song, Tommy insists on asking him about the fastest animal in the world; when they begin the song, I talk to the trees, Tommy quickly interrupts to assert that it is a stupid song from a stupid show (Paint your wagon); "I'm an Ame
Host: Jack Benny --Jack Benny appears with Gloria Chappell, his musical teacher, for a violin duet. --Petula Clark - "Winchester Cathedral" & "This Is My Song" --Johnny Mathis - medley from "Man of La Mancha"
ack Benny (host) --Liza Minnelli --Sammy Davis Jr. - dances to "You Got Trouble," a recording by Robert Preston --Peter and Chris Allen (Australian folk singers) --Beverly Washburn, Iris Adrian and Peggy Mondo (actresses) - appear in a sketch in which they audition a musical act for Benny. --The Rudenko Brothers (jugglers) --Jack Benny and Sammy Davis Jr. - "Fascinating Rhythm," a musical duel with Benny's violin playing against Sammy's dancing and singing.
A comedy/variety special hosted by Jack Benny. The program opens with Hope and Thomas as paper hangers discussing Benny's stinginess. Benny delivers a monologue and explains the program's theme. Highlights of this program include the following: Johnny Carson plays a carnival barker introducing Lucille Ball as a red-headed bombshell who portrays Cleopatra and Helen of Troy in her carnival act; Ben Blue plays the world's foremost mindreader; and Paul Revere and the Raiders sing "Too Much Talk" and "Him or Me," and are interrupted by Benny in the guise of a band member. Also, Blue and Benny perform a pantomime and Carson impersonates Benny.
Highlights include an extended parody of "The Graduate" with Benny and Diller.
Jack Benny in a 1 hour Comedy Special Celebrating his Birthday with Lucille Ball, Dan Blocker, Dennis Day, Ann-Margaret, And Lawrence Welk.
Very funny special with Benny displaying his "groovy" new look. Burns, Benny, Peck perform a vaudeville act.
"The Friars Roast Jack Benny" with Johnny Carson (as the Roastmaster) Guests: --Spiro Agnew (Vice-President) --Milton Berle --George Burns --Phil Harris --Dennis Day --Alan King --Ed Sullivan
20th Anniversary Special with his guests: Frank Sinatra, Bob Hope, Dinah Shore, Dean Martin, Red Skelton, Mel Blanc, Mary Livingston, Eddie Anderson and Benny Rubin.
A one hour special from 1971 Starring Jack Benny. With his guests David Reuben, George Burns, Lucille Ball, Phil Harris, Dionne Warwick & John Wayne.
Jack Benny on the Tonight Show with Johhny Carson. With Guests Jack Benny, Rich Little, Dylana Jenson, Dick Barlow & Roger Pida
Jack Benny on the Tonight Show with Johhny Carson. Also with guests Elke Sommer & Joe Namath
Roasters: Jimmy Stewart, Joey Bishop, Florence Henderson, George Burns, Norm Crosby, Zubin Mehta, Pearl Bailey, Dick Martin, Mark Spitz, Wayne Newton, Rich Little, Demond Wilson, Jack Carter, Foster Brooks, Gary Burghoff
This special aired just days after Jack Benny's unexpected death from pancreatic cancer the day after Christmas, 1974. Hosted by Charles Kuralt, this is a respectful and well done tribute/obituary to a masterful performer and universally beloved human being. Includes a good deal of clips from the Jack Benny radio show and television show, as well as interviews with cast members Frank Nelson, Don Wilson and Mel Blanc. Among the mourners interviewed briefly are Danny Thomas, Ronald & Nancy Reagan, and Milton Berle. There's even a priceless record of Bob Hope's deeply moving eulogy - George Burns was so overcome with grief he was unable to utter more than a few words before needing to be escorted from podium. A show both funny and emotionally moving-- just the kind of tribute a giant like Jack Benny deserved.
A special hosted by three of Jack's close friends featuring clips from past TV shows and specials.
A special featuring vintage clips of comedian Jack Benny, as well as reminiscences by friends.
With Jack Benny, Nannette Fabray and Johnnie Ray
Barry Cryer pays tribute to the heroes of comedy who he has worked with over his many years in the business. Each episode celebrates one legend and include highlights from their comedy careers as Barry recalls some of his funniest moments working with each of them. This British made episode is about Jack Benny
Unedited Newreel Footage form May 1935, May 1941, June 16th 194 and December 1945
Clips of some of Jack Benny's best