He's here, the Phantom of the Opera--and I'm giving him what for!
Love is in the air--or maybe it's the stench from this fanfiction-with-a-budget sequel to "The Phantom of the Opera."
The men behind James Bond bring you this ultra-whimsical slice of WTF.
What's worse than "High School Musical"? How about a low-budget faith-based knockoff of "High School Musical"?
Shiver me timbers and swash me buckle, it's "Pirates of Penzance," 80s-style!
It's Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band, and Diva does not enjoy the show.
Your'e the top--this tribute to early Hollywood musicals, however, is the pits.
Grease 2 is the word--and the word is unprintable.
Diva gets a jolt from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show's"...sequel...ish...type-thing.
Thou shalt not make wannabe epic pop musicals starring Val Kilmer.
The most famous reindeer of all in his least famous film adaptation.
With a title like that, you're asking for trouble.
Gene Kelly. Rollerskating. 'Nuff said.
A little slice of animated weird from Canada. And they seemed so normal up there, too...
It's the eighties-est musical of them all!
A classic Sondheim musical and a skilled Broadway director? What could possibly go wrong?
Diva tells you what she wants, what she really really wants--an end to the torment that is "Spice World."
A fed-up Diva just wants to relax with one of her favorite musical films. Being in Hell, she gets stuck with the crappy remake instead.
Snow White is back, and blander than ever.
Where is this movie going? I don't know. When will it get there? Not soon enough.
The last--and craziest--of the over-the-top disco musicals of 1980.
Odette and Derek are celebrating the holidays in style--well, if you can call bad Auto-Tune and horrifying CGI a style.
Drew Carey stars in a role destined to provide an endless supply of self-mocking humor.
Robert Downey, Jr. has a musical-noir freakout. Or something.
Dorothy goes back to Oz, and encounters annoying villains, creepy puppets, and unscrupulous producers.
To celebrate three years of Musical Hell, Diva's diving back into the world of terrible Italian cartoons based on the world's most famous maritime disaster.
In short there's simply not a more congenial spot for tedious experiences than here in Camelot.
It's Mamma Mia, mockbuster-style!
Ease on down the long, awkwardly-shot road.
There's plenty of discouraging words to say about this movie.
Dumb Slasher Parody: The Musical!
Christina Aguilera and Cher star in a movie that's mostly an excuse to let Christina Aguilera and Cher sing, and to play a game of "spot the cliche" with Diva.
What's the Nutcracker with no ballet, very little music and Albert Einstein? Not much, in this case.
One singular missed opportunity.
It's a hard-knock reboot.
Attend the tale of Sweeney Todd, a movie that's kind of...maybe almost...good, in a way?
How do you turn a story about a girl who can't get a good night's sleep into an epic struggle between good and evil? Not very well, as it turns out.
A classic movie becomes a classic musical becomes a not-so-classic movie.
Yes, it's as bad as you've heard. If anything, it's worse.
In which Don Bluth tries to out-Disney his former employers.
High School Musical meets Monster High. They don't get along very well.
Just another day at the office for Mystery, Inc.--but with singing.
Hey, remember when there was no Christmas for like thirty years until a cloying orphan and her assorted companions brought it back? No? Well, according to this movie it happened. So there.
There's a troll. He's in Central Park. A whole lot of nothing ensues.
Love, George Lucas-style!
The Swan Princess franchise introduces the next generation in CGI creepy!
The one time Christopher Walken's presence didn't improve a movie.
Diva delves into the world of fan-based content, and she has assistance--whether she likes it or not.
Basically, Disney threw a bunch of its better movies in a blender and hit the mix button.
It's Robin Williams in his first not-so-great film role!
Try to remember what has made this musical so endearing--because the movie isn't going to give you a clue.
It's too late for Diva; get out while you still can.
It's de-boring, it's de-tedious, it's de-*snore* ....
Spend your holidays with a beloved Disney classic--getting dragged through the dirt by this crappy direct-to-video midquel.
A kid gets turned into a cat and has to find a singing rooster to stop an owl from keeping the sun from shining. Yes, really.
Part Shakespearean comedy, part classic movie musical tribute, all disappointing.
No windmill or ballad is safe.