Telephone Sketch / Opening Titles / News of the Week / Barry Manilow Sketch / Octavo and Philippe / Gastropod Link / Some Guys Have All the Luck by Robert Palmer / Charlie the Monkey Link / Looking at Literature / Commercial Break / Park Sketch 1 / Bottom of the World / Park Sketch 2 / Competition Results / Alexei Sayle / Jeans Advert / Beat Your Brains Out / Careers '82 / Commercial Break / Bunker Sketch / Around and Around by The Rolling Stones / Spit the Dog Song / How to Cross the Road / Cigarette Trick / The BPITA Award / The Great Gustavo / Weekend Wind-up, and Closing Credits /