Lurcio learns that his master, Ludicrus is promoting a bill in the Senate which will make it possible for a slaves to buy his freedom. Lurcio is very happy about the idea, until he finds that freedom will cost 500 Drachmas. He doesn't have any money, so how can he raise some?
The annual ceremony of the Vestal Virgins is about to be held. The compere hasn't turned up, so Ludicrus has to 'do the homours', aided by Lurcio. Ludicrous is promoting a bill in the Senate to close down the local brothels. This brings him into conflict with the brothel keepers, who plot to ruin the Vestal Virgins ceremony.
Ludicrus becomes involved in a plan to assassinate Julius Caesar. Ammonia gives Lurcio the job of foiling the plot. Lurcio is arrested and taken to Caesar's lieutenant, Ponderous. He's forced to impersonate Caesar in an attempt to catch the plotters.
Ammonia is expecting an unwelcome visit from an old flame. She tells Lurcio to get rid of him using a poisonous asp. When a man arrives at the front door, Lurcio disposes of him, as instructed. Then Ludicrus announces that he's expecting a visit from Stovus Primus...
An army has to be raised to go to Britain to put down revolting natives. Lurcio is forced to go along, though he'd prefer not to.
When the Olympia Theatre Company comes to town, Ammonia sends Lurcio to the theatre with a note for one of the actors, who's one of her old flames. At the same time Ludicrus wants Lurcio to deliver a note to one of the actresses.
Spartacus is the leader of a growing revolt among the slaves of Rome. Lurcio doesn't want to get involved in anything as dangerous as a revolt, but there's no way he can prevent it from affecting him.
Lurcio is given the night off when everyone goes out. Ammonia, Ludicrus and Erotica each give him money so that he'll be out of the house for the evening. Lurcio, however, has other ideas. He's expecting a visit from new neighbour, Lusha. He uses the money to buy a love potion and looks forward to a night of pleasure. Everything goes according to plan ... until the various members of the family sneak back home, expecting the house to be empty.
Ludicrus' uncle dies and leaves him 10,000 drachma. The only snag is that the money will only be paid to Ludicrus if he has a son named after his uncle.
Lurcio is looking after the house while the family are away. He agrees to hide two escaped slaves. Then various members of the family return home unexpectedly.
The secret plans for a new catapult have been stolen. Lurcio becomes involved in attempts to recover the stolen plans and meets the famous secret agent, Jamus Bondus.
Lurcio becomes involved in attempts to prevent Pompeii from going to war with the Barbarians. One of h anti-war activities involves trying to persuade the women of Pompeii to deny conjugal rights if their husbands get involved in the war.
Nausius is in love with a beautiful young girl named Nymphia. He wants to marry her, but his parents aren't sure that this is a good idea.
Ludicrus loses his seat on the Senate. He decides to sell up and move his family to Rome. Lurcio is up for sale to the highest bidder. He's worried about the kind of master or mistress he'll have next.
Ammonia is planning an orgy. She gives Lurcio the job of keeping Ludicrus out of the way. Ludicrus sends Lurcio off to buy a sleeping draught. At the apothecary's shop, Lurcio meets up with Nausius, who's buying a love potion. The sleeping potion and the love potion get mixed up, with predictable consequences.
Lurcio is now a free man, running a wine bar in Pompeii. He's blackmailed by Villainous Brutus, who wants him to drug a gladiator's wine in order to influence the result of his next fight. Things don't go according to plan and Lurcio finds himself in the arena.
Lurcio (Frankie Howerd) becomes the inadvertent possessor of a scroll bearing all the names of the proposed assassins of Nero (Patrick Cargill). The conspirators need to recover the scroll fast, but it has fallen into the hands of Lurcio's master, Ludicrus Sextus (Michael Hordern) who mistakenly reads the contents of the scroll to the Senate. Farcical attempts are made to retrieve the scroll before Pompeii is eventually consumed by the erupting Vesuvius.
The Queen of England gives birth to twins. In order to protect the blood line one is kept and the other hidden in a pig sty and is raised to think it's mother is the pig. Lurkalot is the one raised by pigs who doesn't know his past. He makes a good living as a servant, selling chastity belts on the side. When his master's castle is lost to Sir Braggart de Bombast, Lurkalot must fight to protect his daughter, eventually travelling to the missions to bring back his master. On the mission he uncovers that his twin is Richard the Lionheart and he is of Royal stock and must bring them both back.
Frankie Howerd stars in this comedy as a lowly boot-boy who is a terrible coward. He only goes to war in 1914 after he has been hypnotised to 'save England'. With the German master plan tattooed on his backside (this is the only way he could get the plan back to the British), he goes to the British headquarters, with the Germans in hot pursuit, to try and 'hand over the plans'!!!
